Innocently sitting in a room with my elderly (and smoking, may I mention) family this night, my breaths shorten and deep breaths were as impossible to accomplish as jumping off the Eiffel tower and surviving. I told my mom I wasn't able to breath right, and she took me outside for fresh air and gave me a little does of some sort of something to help me relax.

Then, I sob, at the here-and-gone memory of using a nebulizer (old-fashion inhaler) as a child. The taste and pressurized feel of the dreaded heavy machine races back to me. I can feel it in the back of my throat. I want to hurl over and barf. I then begin crying. My gasp-filled sobs aren't helping the matter, because the more I cried, the more often the feeling came to me.

I was born with asthma. After about five years of age, it had gone away. Tonight, I got quite a scare from a very asthma-attack like feeling. I can't say if it was or not, I can't really tell. But it sure felt like I wasn't going to live to tell about it.

Coughing and taking breaths right now is really hard to do, because there's a pain in my chest, and the more I cough or take a deep breath, I feel the pain in my chest all over again. I'm going to sleep with both of my windows open to circulate air or something, and try to sleep through the night, without being superficially paranoid about practically dying.

Wish me well (: